“You know that you're abused when you're continuously
feeling disrespected, unsafe and controlled."| Dr Friedemann
Have you ever wondered whether you are currently in an abusive relationship?
Maybe your family and friends told you that how you are treated is not ok. But no matter how much pain, disappointment or anxiety your partner causes you, you haven’t found that clarity or strength to admit to yourself that it is time to either make a big change – or end the relationship.
Why is that?
My hope with this episode is that you will gain the clarity and courage to take your power back and reassess what is right for you.
Something I have noticed with my clients, who come to me to work on their anxiety or lack of self-worth, when they are in an abusive relationship, often 80-90% of their focus and energy goes towards trying to figure out how to make their partner and their relationship better, rather than attending to their own needs and goals.
Unlike physical abuse – which may be easier for you to recognize as obviously wrong – emotional abuse can be insidious and confusing.
So here are 5 of the most common symptoms of being stuck in an emotionally abusive relationship:
1. Rule of thumb, if you feel continuously controlled, disrespected and intimidated, you are likely in an abusive relationship.
2. You are increasingly unsure about yourself; while you know that your partner often hurts, disappoints and even scares you, you have convinced yourself that you have the keys to make them better and that ultimately the state of the relationship is your problem and your responsibility
3. You feel drained and stressed simultaneously, as the fluctuating mood of your partner makes you constantly ride on an emotional roller-coaster. You are anxious and devastated when they are unhappy with you or withdraw from you and relieved and elated when you are on their good side.
4. You have disconnected from your friends and family, ignored your hobbies, given up on self-care and are barely hanging on to your job.
5. Nothing seems to matter besides making your relationship work. Because when it is good – it is like heaven. Unfortunately – most of the time, you feel like you are in purgatory.
If you or someone you know is in this situation please join me on this week’s release of Get Real on Thursday February 24th at 9am PST/12pm EST where I talk about abusive relationships: how to know if you are in one and what you can do to find peace and happiness, whether that be with your partner or moving on alone.