When is it time to fight and when to surrender?

Ten years ago, my life changed dramatically. First, my father passed away in April. Then, Danielle had a complicated surgery, which meant that we couldn’t have children. And just a few weeks after that, my mother died from cancer. It was then, that I had to face the fact that in contrary to my long-held belief, I truly wasn’t in control of my life – and that surrendering to what had happened was a wiser choice than fighting it.

During this time of global change and uncertainty, fighting for our loved ones, for keeping what we have, and reclaiming what we lost, seems to be the most courageous choice. We were taught that what makes the difference for those people who get what they want is their determination to fight for it. Yet, fighting at all costs can also lead to banging our head against the wall and paddling upstream without getting anywhere. When despite our greatest efforts we don’t get reach our goals, letting go and surrendering can be the bravest and smartest decision we can make.

Personally, I believed for a long time what I was taught as a child: no matter how high the obstacles and how difficult the problems, I should be able to succeed. And most of the time, that attitude worked just fine, which gave me a great deal of confidence and satisfaction. However, what I didn’t consider was whether there could have been an easier way to success, or even more importantly, whether my goals were always worth pursuing. Since 2010, I learned to let go of my dog with a bone approach, and listen more to Danielle’s ease and grace approach to life. Have you ever noticed that things frequently unfold more smoothly and quickly, if you give up control and allow them to happen instead of making them happen?

Surrender isn’t defeat, giving up, or powerlessness. To surrender is choose acceptance over resistance, appreciation over expectations and flexibility over foolishness.  This doesn’t mean that we should become inactive and complacent. To the contrary. As we are yielding to the flow of life, we still need to do our part to stay on course and pursue our dreams and goals. However, being in alignment with the natural current, allows us to get there faster and with much greater ease.

In the words of Eckhart Tolle: “Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you.” Join me this Thursday, May 7th at 9AM PT / 12PM ET on Empowerment Radio, and learn how practicing the art of surrender can help you to navigate through these challenging times with greater ease and grace. You may also join me on Facebook Live.

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