Nothing made sense about how I felt about life. I had a happy family, great friends, my full health and a soaring career which afforded me an enviable lifestyle. The more success I had, the worse I felt inside.
Although I usually kept myself busy enough during the day at work to escape my feelings, my downtime was filled with feelings of anxiety and depression. I was worried about everything and constantly imagined doomsday scenarios about my future, none of which were reasonable or consistent with past experiences. I anticipated that at some point I would fail, though I never had. The more I tried to stay on top of the uncertainties of life, the worse I got. All my time with my family was spent in a fearful darkness, I could no longer feel any pleasure. I then went through 5 years of anti-depressants which lifted most of the symptoms. However, the side effects were awful and made me feel disconnected from my emotional life. I decided that this was not a good life and that there must be a better way.
After reading many books, seeing a number of therapists and countless hours on the web, I encountered “The Fear and Anxiety Solution” by Dr. Friedemann Schaub. I read the book and worked through the exercises. I found that it resonated in a way that other resources did not. It helped me to peel away the layers of the past and challenge beliefs I had held about myself unconsciously.
It showed me that different periods of my childhood had instilled deep and buried feelings of worthlessness and that I later developed compensating heroic beliefs. Both of these opposing beliefs remained in conflict with each other and with my present self and manifested themselves as two unconscious personalities – a protector personality and a hero personality. Both hiding in plain sight!
Dr. Friedemann’s approach helped me to uncover, reconcile and value these parts of my psyche, while at the same time building a new set of mature beliefs founded in reality and self compassion. We completed a series of one-to-one counseling sessions using Skype which repeated, refreshed and enhanced the steps in the book and helped me to develop a plan to sustain my progress and work on a new reality. I have now been over a year free of drugs and irrational anxiety. I enjoy life now and have a wholesome sense of self belief that I didn’t realize was missing in the first place. I no longer seek external validation and I no longer have the constant sense that my world is going to come crumbling down. I used to spend so much of my mental life fighting imaginary demons. Now I spend my time doing the things I enjoy and have a renewed vigour and lust for life and all it has to offer. If you are determined to reject the narrative that anxiety, depression and anti depressants are inevitable consequences of modern life and are prepared to do the work, then Dr. Friedemann’s methods can work for you to create a different reality. It is not just about eliminating the negative thinking, but creating a thought system that provides for a rich and fulfilling mental life.
Dr Friedemann is a wonderful person and I enjoyed all our interactions. His program has been transformational for me and I wholeheartedly recommend it.